Thursday, 7 January 2010

Things I Have Said To My Husband Today

  • Ooh thankyou
  • I do love Christmas
  • Especially the present getting bit
  • Ooh this one's nice and squishy
  • Is it from you?
  • Lovely
  • Ummm
  • It's very large
  • Err
  • Um
  • Is it a rug?
  • A throw?
  • A what?
  • Slanket?
  • What's a slanket?
  • I'm well aware that I'm holding one
  • But how would one use it exactly?
  • For wearing?
  • It looks like a two large dog rugs sewn together
  • One that the dog would refuse to sit on
  • I wear it?
  • How?
  • Over my head
  • Oh I see
  • Why?
  • Well I'm sure it will be comfortable
  • Yes, yes it's lovely
  • But really
  • Well,
  • It would be just as easy to sew two dog rugs together
  • And put that over my head
  • Yes it would look rubbish
  • Exactly
  • Well I'll give it a go
  • What do you mean there's more?
  • More presents?
  • No
  • Well what then?
  • It's big enough for two
  • Do you mean the two of us?
  • Well I thought maybe you meant you and the dog
  • Well why would we sit in a dog rug together?
  • It's a naked thing?
  • It does not
  • It does not say that on the label
  • Yes I can read
  • Yes it says for naked use only
  • But the handwriting gives it away
  • As does the small pornographic drawing
  • No it doesn't get me in the mood
  • At all
  • I said At All
  • Yes I suppose we could give it a try tonight
  • You've rented a DVD?
  • To watch?
  • Fantastic
  • Well yes I suppose we could watch it naked in the slanket
  • What's the movie?
  • Die Hard
  • I think I'll have an early night
  • Yes you can borrow the slanket

41 comments:

Suburban Princess said...

LOL! Sounds like the kind of thing my husband would do! Right down to the drawing!

messymimi said...

Hilarious.

No matter the age or the language, they all seem to think alike.

Aimee said...

I thought it was extremely sweet and romantic right up to "die hard."

nappy valley girl said...

Oh God - I just had to look up a picture of a slanket and now I can't stop giggling.

It looks like one of those blankets you get on the plane (except not any more, they've banned them because of the Detroit lap bomber I believe).

Word veri is 'rebrain'. Something we should do to husbands?

AnyEdge said...

I don't understand. He got you a present. He wrapped it. And it was designed for you to do something together. Seems to me that he hit the trifecta. This is why we men think you women are never satisfied!!

Mike said...

ROFLMAO too funny.

Herding Cats said...

Slankets, Snuggies.....wow, it just keeps getting better and better.

London City Mum said...

Like NVG, I had to look this up. I love the description:

"The Slanket is a gigantic fleece blanket with sleeves. A very soft to the touch, lightweight, but warm fleece blanket with large, loose sleeves designed so you don't feel like you're wearing the blanket, simply wrapped up in its wonder. The Slanket is designed to keep your entire body covered and cozy while you still retain the use of your hands. Simplistic and practical, its innovativeness opens up possibilities, but still can replace any normal blanket."

Sorry, whatever happened to wearing an extra sweater and some woolly socks? Or am i really behind the times here?

LCM x

p.s. WV 'whign', gigantic fleece blanket version of whinging

Mike said...

Roll On Floor Laugh My Ass Off. No code just got a great laugh from your post.

Mike said...

Nope. Here you can use this in the future. www.urbandictionary.com for all your slang and acronym use.

5thsister said...

Snuggie? Slanket? Which came 1st and who is infringing on the other's copyright.

And just so you know...I received a Snuggie for Christmas and to be perfectly honest...I LOVE IT! I suffer Raynaud's disease (decreased circulation to the extremities when exposed to the cold). That, along with a frugal husband means a frigid house. The Snuggie has been a hit. My daughter went out and bought one and now my son wants to get one of his own. My husband thinks we're nuts. He's probably right!

Young Wife said...

Tee hee! How funny! Stopping by from SITS.

Eva Gallant said...

I loved that one side of the conversation! so funny!

Millennium Housewife said...

SP perhaps they're related?

Mimi, do you think if we learned Italian we'd hear all the same stuff?

Aimee, then you haven't been reading this blog for long.... x

NVG, crikey you do your homework

AE if trifecta means bum deal then you've hit the proverbial nail.

HC, err, would you like a slanket? I've got one going

LCM, see NVG

Mike I think I love you

Sister, ok you're forgiven on this one, your relatives on the other hand...

Teresa @ ♥ TOO MANY HEARTBEATS ♥ said...

Hi, I'm stopping by from SITS! I wanted to share a bit of comment l♥ve.

I got a Slanket (which came BEFORE the Snuggie and is much higher quality from what I understand :0) for Christmas last year and I absolutely LOVE it! Maybe you and your hubby can make it work after all. At least give it a try. But, um, I don't believe I want to hear that conversation - either side. LOL!

I hope you have a wonderful day!

Teresa <><

http://toomanyheartbeats.blogspot.com

Adrian's Crazy Life said...

That is a hilarious conversation. I love that your husband thought he was going to get some lovin' out of it because he had bought you this fabulous, wonderful present. Silly men, they never get it.

Clare Wassermann said...

What excellent hours of fun you'll have together... xx

Chatterbox said...

Fantastic! hilarious :)
Your wonderful articles never fail to bring a smile to my face.

Happy New Year buddy.

Hope to see you around

Cheers!!

Vicus Scurra said...

Keep up the good work.

Expat mum said...

I can't get that picture out of my head! Hope no one knocks at the door!

Tooting Squared said...

Awwww! And to think ... some people think that the age of romance is dead!
x

My name is PJ. said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting!

This was darn funny...and yet further proof that all boys have cooties!

Sara said...

I'm rolling! Hysterical! He's a creative one that is for sure. Die Hard to get you in the mood, huh? BWHAHAHAHAH!

Mud in the City said...

Slanket hanky panky? Cosy; not logistically complicated. At least it leave the 'hands free'!

Kelloggsville said...

God really didn't put a lot of effort into the man brain moment of the design plan did he.....naked sex in a dog blanket lookalike in front of die hard just isn't going to happy anywhere outside of 'man thought process' land. I would have said fantasy land but that as a fantasy just leaves a bad taste in ones mouth!!!!!!!!!! yet another good post - I hope there is an element of fiction in them otherwise OMG poor you!!!

Brandie said...

Stopping by from SITS and I'm so glad I did. Such an adorable blog and thanks for the good laugh! I'm in Tennessee and we are shut down for to inches:)!

Ice Queen said...

For naked use only...be careful with the Slanket!

Summer said...

Men!

Devoted said...

Love it! Love IT! LOVE IT! :-D Have a wonderful 2010...

Teresa @ ♥ TOO MANY HEARTBEATS ♥ said...

Ok, I promise if you promise. :0)

Thanks for stopping by. I have just become you newest 'Follower'. I hope you'll come by to visit me again, too.

Have a super day!

Teresa <><

Just Breathe said...

Funny......
I love Christmas too!
Have a great weekend.

Jayde said...

That was funny! I'd have taken my man up on the nakedness in the slanket with Die Hard any day. But that's just me! Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

Helene said...

Don't feel too bad...I could see myself having the same exact conversation with my hubby.

That's what I call a "To you, For me" present. My husband gets me those all the time.

Chatty Girl said...

What a great idea to capture this! I loved it. Much enjoying your blog, new follower! All my best, Chatty Girl

Denise Burks said...

LOVE YOUR WORK! Thanks for noticing my presence.

Denise Burks

www.successinthesuburbs.blogspot.com
www.stepmotherinthesuburbs.blogspot.com
www.successfulweightlossinthesuburbs.blogspot.com

MissJody said...

Thank you for stopping by my blog :)

Your blog had me in stitches! I love it!! Have a great day1

Nezzy said...

Too funny. I'm thinkin' this chick is gonna have to find a slanket.

Thanks for poppin' over with your sweet comment.

Have a wonderful weekend! It sounds like your gonna!!!

Joe said...

Very amusing! Great post.

Vivianne's Vista said...

Naked in the slanket doesn't sound half bad to me. A few drinks, a few kisses, Die Hard wouldn't stand a chance! LOVED LOVED this post! Thanks for stopping by mine!

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

I'm surprised he didn't call it a skanket. Or make a joke about humping like dogs. But really, "Die Hard"? Did you put a little blue pill in HIS stocking? Wishful thinking? Very funny stuff~!

Perfectly Happy Mum said...

I have been around for a while, but now I know that I've missed you! :)
Love the look of the new website BTW :)